Keeping Your Marriage First Through the Homeschool Journey

Marriage can be tough.

Homeschool can be tough.

Put together, and well without a plan, God and Prayer…you will have a mess!

No one really told me that homeschooling could get in the way of my marriage.  How can it, I thought when I read someone say that homeschooling and marriage don’t mix…then I realized, it is true…

Your MARRIAGE must come before your HOMESCHOOL. I have seen so many split in the last two years, and this is very concerning. Some believe that homeschool marriages are immune to all the troubles…in fact it is not, it is even more vulnerable. Moms you spend your days taking care of your children and home, and are worn out by the time your husbands come home. You have to make sure you have time for them.

Without limits, homeschool can take over your entire life.  Since you feel responsible for your children’s education, you try to make EVERYTHING educational.  That really is not bad, but…if you put off too much during the day and have the books out all night, and your husband is shoved to the side…well, you have just put your marriage below your homeschool.

The old saying that God, marriage, then children…well there is a lot of merit to that.  Why? Because, that is HOW it SHOULD be.

Ephesians 5:25-33

Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, …

I am going to admit the homeschool mom is busy, there are not enough hours in her day.  Therefore, what are we to do?

We delegate!!  We delegate our children to do things around the home to free up some of our time to spend time with our husbands.

My children have daily and weekly chores, and I have list of chores for their ages.

Upper Elementary to Middle School

Birth through Elementary.

Saturday mornings are reserved for cleaning the house…in a more detailed manner.  My husband tends work most Saturday mornings.  Therefore, when he is home early evening on Saturdays, he comes home to a nice clean house and enjoys that we have cleaned up for him.

By having your children help in the home, you are able to free up more of your time, to accomplish things such as:

• lesson plans
• children’s bathes
• meal preparation
• homeschool
• and more

I have one child that is very “self driven”.  This helps me a lot with our younger children, as she can do flashcards, read alouds and things through the home to give me more time to get other things done.

The goal in all this is to have time for my husband when he gets home.  We need to be done with our daily stuff by the time our husbands are home.  In reality, I still struggle greatly with this, but I see the NEED, if I want to have a marriage that Glorifies God and is an example to your children.

Your husband should be the head of the house.  They should be the final word.  This does not mean that you have no say.  You should spend time discussing and talking together.

Ephesians 5:22-33

²² Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. ²³For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. ²⁴Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.

²⁵ Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, ²⁶that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, ²⁷so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.^{[a] 28}In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. ²⁹For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, ³⁰because we are members of his body. ³¹ "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." ³²This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. ³³However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.The

This will take a load off your shoulders too.  You will not have to stress over things as much. 

My prayer for homeschool wives is:

You will put your marriage first, for your children, for your husband, for yourself and ultimately for God.  Your home will be stronger, more enjoyable, and healthier for all. May your marriage and family glorify God in all you do.

I want to add, to hear more about marriage and being a wife, you can join me and ten other wives Nov. 1-3 for the To Have and To Hold  Replenish Your Soul online Marriage Conference.  Tonight at 7 pm central time, we will be having a Facebook Party.

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